Jaded

- Aerosmith

I wonder how many people have heard all of these songs I use as titles. I wonder... about stuff alot lately. The what ifs of life preoccupy. I'm just a little tired at this point, of things not going right, not being able to study, fighting myself and other people. I want to curl up into my bed and sleep until it blows over. The see saw sways, tipping this was and that never balancing out. I have read blogs, newspapers, magazines and books but cannot pay attention to my notes. Why is it that concentration spans are only 20 minutes when it comes to anything remotely purposeful and infinite for television. Everything around is boring; my day, my books even T.V. Is there a way to move into the day dream? Dreams do not become reality, thats just something they tell you to instill what they call hope. I'm not cynical, Im just having a bad... month and dont seem to have the willpower to do jackshit about it. It sucks to know whats wrong, that your lying to yourself and how much you really suck. It just sucks. Have you ever tried eating two of every meal of the day? Well Don't. If there were rules to life it would be so boring, and yet we follow them diligently. Theories of life and other things irrelevant are also blah after a point. God Bless WTs staccato it makes reams of bullshit seem coherant. But now you cant expect coherant writing when life is all over the place. Not stream of consciousness.. NO! Ugh. Yawn.